What's it like to be gay?

You know that feeling you get in your gut when you see a hot guy, that animalistic attraction that's actually a physical sensation? I, too, get that from guys, but I get none of it from females. I can look at a woman, think 'wow, she's hot' but feel absolutely none of that gut level of attraction that I feel for good-looking guys. It's been that way as long as I can remember. Even when I was little, I liked to look at my girl cousins' teen fan magazines because the guys in them just did something for me. I didn't know what or uality even was, but looking at those guys made me feel good. Here I am, at 52, and in a committed, monogamous relationship for 11 years, and looking at a good-looking guy still makes me feel good. And looking at women still doesn't.